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Big Blue Reader Commodore to PC File Conversion Dave Mohr Tribute What it's Like in Fresno Computer Health Risks Grandkids & Commodore Gaming I Become a Commodore User Again On the Edge - book review RUNning Back in Time A Visit to the Roach Motel |
Big Blue Reader in the 21st Century By
As Commodore becomes less and less a factor in most people’s computing
activities, one of the most useful and important programs for the C128
becomes more important. The
name, “Big Blue Reader,” (
Although the program came with a fairly clear manual, and most of its
capabilities can be carried out via on-screen menu choices, there are
subtle nuances that can only be discovered through use, experimentation,
or help from another users, especially when using
At its most basic level, This article is not intended to be a comprehensive re-stating of the manual – rather it is a series of hints and tips about things that may not be obvious when using the program, to help the user avoid some of the pitfalls that serve to frustrate and delay the conversion process. Converting Commodore files to PC requires the original source disk, which can be a 5.25 or 3.5 disk, and a 3.5 disk formatted to 730 Kb. Back in the day, your PC would give you this option when formatting a floppy, but I believe starting with Windows 98, you could only format a disk at 1.38 Mb. Fortunately, BBR has a utility to format a MS-DOS disk on the 1581.
BBR
runs only on the 128 in 80 column mode. When it boots up, the opening
screen offers three options: 1. Use standard ASCII translation 2. Use screen code 3. Format 1571 disk
For text files, if you’re not sure what format your
CBM
word processor used, you can view the directory (from within
BBR
, or before booting it). If your files are SEQ, choose option 1; if they
are
Once the program finishes loading, you are presented with a number of
menu options. One of these is Utility, which is where you can format
your PC disk if necessary. Normally the first choice I use is Drive I/O,
which is where you set your source and target drive. Since there is a
Disk Command option, it is possible to copy files from a partition on a
hard drive. You should make a note of the exact partition and
subdirectory name in advance, since you have to type them in without
recourse to the directory. The source can be any 15XX drive and probably
most third party clones; the target needs to be a 3.5” drive. I no
longer remember if the program will create and write to an
The next step is to load the directory of your source disk, using the
LOAD
DIR
option. You will be asked what type of disk (
This is where the author did what I think was some low level “copy
protection” – there is nothing on screen to tell you what to do next
(of course, it is in the manual). What you do is hit the UP ARROW key.
Once again you are given a choice as what type of disk to write to ( The first is “Convert to standard ASCII?” Answer YES if you are converting text files, and you chose option 2 (screen code) from the opening screen. For all other situations, answer NO. The second is “add line feeds?” Answer YES if you are converting text files, regardless of the choice made at the opening screen. For other types of files, answer NO.
The third is “retain same file names?” I recommend answering YES in
most cases, and here I need to get into a detailed discussion of one of
idiosyncrasies of Big Blue Reader. In the early days of PCs, they could
only accept a file name of eight characters, plus an optional three
character extension (this was at a time when Commodore file names could
be much longer). Therefore many of us gave nice long descriptive names
to our
BBR
automatically uses the first eight characters of the existing file name,
discarding spaces and non-alpha-numeric characters. Therefore both file
names in the example would be converted to “familyhi.” When Once you have converted your first disk of files, you should check it on your PC. If you let the program create the file names, you will not have a file extension, and your PC will not recognize the program type. There are several easy ways to deal with this. The simplest (in my opinion) is to open the files from within your Windows word processor. Most such programs will recognize the file as text, and may offer a conversion option. Select the default option. Another way is re-name all the files, adding .txt to the file name. Your word processor will recognize the files as text, but may still ask for a conversion option. You can also open these files in WordPro or WordPad, but editing capabilities are limited. The third option is to open Windows Explorer (AKA My Computer), right click on the file, and use the OPEN WITH option, selecting the desired word processor. In all these cases, the final result is the same – whatever BBR has created will appear on the screen for further processing.
There are times when following my instructions regarding ASCII vs.
Screen Code, or converting to ASCII when you start the conversion
process will turn out to be wrong – you will get a screen full of
garbage, or more likely, upper and lower case will be reversed. In this
case, go back to
Many So far I have focused mainly on text file conversion, but it is possible to convert other types of files. To do so, you should ALWAYS use option 1 (Standard ASCII) from the opening screen, and ALWAYS answer NO to the two questions regarding converting to standard ASCII and adding line feeds.
Once these former GEOS files are in SEQ format, then you simply load I have also converted Commodore programs that were downloaded from a BBS via a MS-DOS computer. Such downloads can’t be executed on a PC, but they can be converted to Commodore format and then should run normally on a C64 or whatever computer they were written for. It is also possible to convert Windows text files to Commodore format. While the process is fairly straight forward, there is one point to consider – if the ultimate plan is to convert to geoWrite, use all UPPER CASE characters in your file name. In fact, I recommend using upper case for any files that are created or will be used in GEOS.
The Windows to 1. Convert your Windows word processor file to a plain text file by selecting File/Save as. From the Save as Type drop-down, chose Plain Text (*.txt) (Note: These file commands are from Microsoft Word; other word processors may express them differently.) 2. Copy these files to a 3.5 disk formatted to 730 Kb.
3. Follow the conversion instructions above, using option 1 from the
opening screen. Select MS-DOS as the source and 4. Answer NO to the Standard ASCII question (it’s already in that format). You may have to experiment with whether to add line feeds for not. 5. The converted result should be a standard ASCII file, which can be converted to geoWrite using the Wrong is Write utility. It can be loaded as is with The Write stuff and presumably many other Commodore word processors, but TWS is the only one I can vouch for. From this point you can add GEOS or Commodore commands for bold, underline or other desired formatting. A few final comments: If you have a CMD hard drive, I can vouch that Big Blue Reader works just fine from a 1571 emulation partition.
If you make the wrong choice at the early steps, it will normally be
obvious when you look at your converted file on the PC. If upper and
lower case are reversed, you probably said YES to standard ASCII, and
need to change it to NO. If there are extra line feeds, say NO to the
linefeed question. And if the text on the screen is gibberish, you
probably made the wrong choice at the opening screen. DISCLAIMER:
I have not and will not in this lifetime tested all the possible
conversion procures, Commodore programs, and Windows programs that might
be involved in using Big Blue Reader. Follow the standard rules and
always back up your files before doing anything new with them. Test your
results before spending a lot of time on one part of the project. Send
us an Email if you have
questions (a reply is guaranteed; answers will depend on my knowledge
and ability to make good guesses!) |
Converting Commodore Files to PC Format |
David “Lord Ronin” Mohr – a Tribute by Robert Bernardo “Ow!
Dave, you're making me laugh too much.” For the next 3 ½ hours, Dave and I
had our own MossyCon, the others having attended the day before.
His eyes would light up with every Commodore computer I pulled
out of my car – PET 2001, PET 4032, PET 8032, modded SX-64, Amiga
CD-32. “If you don't want to take that back
to Years and years.... Fast forward to MossyCon 5 in 2009, a
different venue – the Moose Lodge in “I think it was 2001, Dave.” “No, Robert, it was before you knew
Jeri Ellsworth.” “You know... you're right, Dave,”
and we determined it was from the late 1990's.
I seemed to think it was from 1998 or 1999 when I first visited
his Amiga-Commodore User Group on the way back from a visit to the Amiga
computer dealer, Wonder Computers, in Ten years of visits to him in When the annual Commodore Vegas Expo
started in 2005, I dreamt of methods to get him to He did tell me about having a table at
the annual Portland Orycon event, a role-playing gamers
convention. Though in
later years he boycotted the show, during the times he did go to it, he
spoke favorably of it where he would dress up, talk RPG, promote
Commodore computers, and espouse the Klingon way.
Yeah, Dave was a fan of the Star Trek original series.
When he found out about my taking sides with Starfleet, he looked
at me and sniffed half-seriously, “Staaarfleeeet...” Dave could throw out a choice phrase
in Klingon when needed. For
that matter, Dave could blurt out choice phrases in British English,
German, and Yiddish. And the
speed with which he could turn a phrase would always amaze me. “Dave, how should I respond to this
person who is bugging me?” “Robert, this is what you say...”
Needless to say, now I have a quick response in German. Dave could appropriately modulate his
voice, too, being a former radio disc jockey.
He would turn on his radio voice and read a line from his radio
station, and I would be properly impressed. One
thing he couldn't do was communicate in Spanish at a Mexican restaurant.
I had to teach him. “Robert, how do you say, 'I'm
Jewish. I cannot eat
pork.'?” “This is the way, Dave.
Say, 'Soy judio. No
puedo comer cerdo.'” Dave loved his many and varied pet
cats. It didn't matter to
him whether they slept on top of the Commodore keyboards or on his lap.
He would rescue those he could and rehabilitate them.
Every time I visited his house, I had to be aware of where the
cats were for fear of stepping on them or for fear of them jumping on
me. Dave took great pleasure
in my discomfort. “That one, Robert, has especially
sharp claws.” I would then huddle on a chair with
books, boxes, or computer parts covering my lap.
When he found out about my preferring dogs, he looked at me and
sniffed half-seriously, “Doooogs...” It was only last year I found out that
Dave was a prisoner of war in the He was a fan of other movies and t.v.
shows, especially British t.v. shows – Red Dwarf, Monty Python, Dr.
Who, Gerry Anderson shows like UFO, and his supreme favorite, the
Prisoner. When he found out
that I would be visiting He enjoyed the souvenirs I brought to
him from the The last Peter and I saw Dave was on
our mid-June visit to Now I can only listen to that little
part of him captured on my MossyCon videos.
Now I can only see him in the photos I took of him.
Now I can only read his musings in his Village Green newsletter
or in the accumulated e-mails and postings I have from him.
Now I can only relive the memories I have of him, though those
memories may fade in time. He
was the Master, the Sensei... and he always considered me the kid. The night before he passed away... 12
hours before... he made a posting on Facebook.
He was joking about his cats and about pretty girls.
He talked about “Slow now, only about an hour of online time a
day.” He talked about
“Getting there, had a slight relapse on Monday.”
And he talked about his German Jew father and Scotch-Irish
mother. As he remarked,
“So there may be a slight reason why I have a slight stubborn streak.
(LOL)” A stubborn streak that kept him in
Commodore, a stubborn streak that kept his club together, a stubborn
streak kept him going through every trial and tribulation in his
personal life; those tribulations he would try to explain to me, and I
couldn't understand all of them. The only thing I understood was that
Dave was a good man, a good friend. |
What it's Like in Fresno By Dick Estel Back in the early 1990s I was the editor of the Fresno Commodore User Group’s newsletter, The Interface. In addition, I handled all the exchange newsletter duties, sending copies to 30 or more other Commodore clubs throughout the country. I
also got first look at the newsletters that we received in exchange from
those other clubs. It was always interesting to see the different
approaches to layout, writing styles, and other aspects of these
publications. In 2004, driving from Fresno to Ohio, I had occasion to pass through Bartlesville. Sure enough, there was the tall building I had seen in the newsletter, about 15 stories tall. But where was the city? In fact, the town was no bigger than Kingsburg (for those of you in northeast Ohio, it was no bigger than Delta; and for those of you in Oklahoma, it was far smaller than Enid). At CommVEx this year, there happened to be a young man who had spent some of his youth in Bartlesville, so I inquired about the town’s striking landmark. It seems that it was commissioned by a local oil baron many years ago, and was designed by the famous architect, Frank Lloyd Wright. I thought of this recently when our editor, Lenard Roach, wrote about the floods they have experienced in Kansas City, causing a vacant lot to turn into a semi-permanent lake. Lenard is certainly not the first editor to offer comments on “what it’s like” in his location. He may be the first to ask “what’s it like” in the club’s home area. Actually
he asked “how is the weather there in southern California?” Although our president, Robert Bernardo, does participate in a club
based in southern California, where we live is more properly considered central
California, more specifically the Great Central Valley, and even more locally, the
San Joaquin
As
to what the weather is like, in the summer it is hot and dry. There is
probably more water in Lenard’s lake right now than falls in the
entire San Although 100 degree temperatures are normal in the summer, it’s quite dry, so we don’t suffer the effects of high humidity, and air conditioning is standard equipment in virtually all homes and vehicles. And when the temperature gets up to 110, as it always does for a few days each summer, we can head for the mountains, a 60 mile trip to beautiful camping areas, or to the coast, a three hour drive or less. And
that’s what it’s like in |
Computer Health Risks Under “O for Ouch,” it is reported that the most dangerous machine in your house may be your computer. “Each year 9,300 Americans suffer a computer-related injury” the article states. The most common injury was laceration from a sharp corner. Among adults, falling equipment accounted for 21% of injuries. Children under 5 suffered 13.4% of all injuries, most of them to the head, and most as a result of climbing on or near equipment. I guess the Commodore engineers knew what they were doing when they gave the C64 rounded corners. I recall one of my PC boxes was pretty squared off, but the current one is nicely rounded on all sides. I’m still not clear how equipment falls on people – keep that CPU on or under the desk! -- |
Grandsons and Commodore Gaming By
One day in 1988 my three-year old grandson and I headed for Sears, lured by an ad for a Commodore computer. We returned home with a C64 and a Blue Chip drive (the latter did not work right and they gave me a 1541 in exchange at the same price). While my interests were in word processing and data organization, Johnny became a proficient game player, racking up high scores in Frogger, Pac-Man and Rock Crash. In the 1990s it came time for me to move on to a Windows based PC, and Johnny’s game interests turned toward Doom and NHL Hockey. I still kept my Commodore set up, but used it mainly to research questions from Commodore users. Meanwhile, Johnny’s little brother Mikie came along in 1997, and in due time developed an interest in games on the PC. About three years ago, I put away all my Commodore equipment except a 128 keyboard and 1084 monitor. I plugged a Pac-Man cartridge into the 128, essentially creating an arcade game machine. Then one day when Mikie was visiting, I fired the C128 up and introduced him to Pac-Man. Today, although he enjoys a number of games on the PC, he also usually plays Pac-Man for a while when he visits. I recently set up a complete Commodore system again, and he added Frogger and Rock Crash to his repertoire (although we need to have Johnny come over and show us how to get past the very difficult level one in this program). Mikie’s Commodore experience was broadened one day when he went with me to a meeting of the Fresno Commodore User Group at the Pizza Pit. After using up all his quarters playing some of the arcade games there, he wandered over to the meeting area, and was introduced to the DTV, the joystick that contains the hardware and software to play a number of classic Commodore games on any compatible monitor. He especially enjoyed Jump Man and Dig Dug. A DTV may be under his Christmas tree this year. As for Johnny, at age 21 he’s packing around a state-of-the-art laptop. With 20 units at Cal State Fresno, his computer time is pretty much limited to homework. (Originally published in 2005) |
I become a Commodore User Again By Dick Estel My first computer was a Commodore 64, purchased new for $200 from Sears in 1987. I followed a pattern that was probably common with many owners of that era – buying the computer and disk drive, and using the TV for a monitor. I quickly realized that the TV resolution was not going to work, and soon owned a monitor and a printer. I bought a word processor program, which I expected to be my primary use for the computer. I was already familiar with word processing on a dedicated Wang system (WP only). I stumbled around trying to figure things out on the C64, and finally discovered the local user group, which greatly enhanced my experience. Over
the years I owned a second C64, then a 128, and maybe at times two of
them (can’t remember all the details after 24 years). My “last”
Commodore set-up was a C128 with a one meg Of course, I went through one or two more printers, ending with a Star NX1020 Rainbow, an excellent color dot matrix unit. The Commodore served me well for a number of years, as I expanded my interests to include, among other things, desktop publishing, first with the horrible Paper Clip Publisher, then with GeoPublish. I produced the club newsletter with this program for two or three years. Eventually I realized that the Commodore’s limitations meant it was time to jump into the Windows world. I had been using a PC with Windows 3.1 at work, and realized that I could do some things in a few minutes that took a half hour with the Commodore. I also got interested in graphic applications, mainly editing my many digital photos, and scanning old photos. Around
this same time CMD came out with the Super CPU accelerator. I gave some
thought to adding this to my hardware setup, but at $200, I was put off.
I suspected that I could upgrade my Commodore system indefinitely with
new hardware, at considerable expense and without gaining much if
anything in the graphic area. Or I could buy what was still called an
“ My first PC was an Acer with 16 Mb of memory, and other specs typical of the day, which I think was about 1995. It cost nearly $2000, and was far less capable than what you can get today for $300 or so. At first the Commodore remained on my computer desk and the Acer had a secondary spot on a old office desk. As I began to use the PC more and the Commodore less, they switched places; and I stored or sold some of my duplicate Commodore equipment. This progression continued, until I reached a point where someone described me as a “Commodore user in name only.” In fact, I had reached a point where the only thing I used the Commodore for was to research and help solve problems other users were having. When I began making plans to move out of my house where I’d been for 30 years into a condo, I sold or donated to the club all the equipment I had left except the CMD hard drive, the REU, and a PacMan cartridge. This did not diminish my loyalty to the Commodore user group, and I remain interested in the new developments that have taken place long after the old classic was been declared dead by the world at large. By this time my latest Windows machine was about six years old, running on XP, and taking care of all my computing needs. As keeper of the club equipment, I could still set up a C128 system, which I did for copying library disks or converting files with Big Blue Reader. But for all practical purposes, I was not a Commodore user except in the most limited way. In 2010 and again in 2011 one of the big prizes at our annual CommVEx show in Las Vegas was an SX64, and for reasons I could not explain to myself, I purchased tickets for it both years, breathing a quiet sigh of relief when I failed to win both times. Then along came the donation of a large cache of equipment from the now defunct Jason Ranheim Company. The stipulation was that the items were to be given to club members and others, so when our president, Robert Bernardo, drove up with his Crown Vic stuffed with free goodies, I put in a claim on the only SX64 in the batch. Once again I was an actual Commodore user, although I have no place to set it up permanently. I plugged it in and did some disk copying, with the CMD hard drive as the source. Since the SX does not have JiffyDOS, I had to dig out the hard drive manual, and figure out how to type in the lengthy commands to change partitions. I also plugged in the PacMan cart, and got all the dots in the first round, despite not having played in a year or so. So
far that’s all I have done, and the SX sits in a corner. Every key was
either so sticky I had to press and hold it for a few seconds, or
printed the character three or four times as soon as it was pressed, so
the keyboard is with Ray Carlson in With no convenient place to set it up, I don’t think the SX will get a lot of use, but at least when I do need to do something, I can get it set up very quickly. So over a quarter century period I have come full circle, from minimal Commodore set-up to minimal Commodore set-up. (Originally published in 2011) |
Book Reivew: On the Edge - The Spectacular Rise and Fall of Commodore © 2005 by
Brian Bagnall; published by Variant Press http://www.variantpress.com/books/on-the-edge I glanced through it, saw some interesting paragraphs, and purchased a copy in September of 2006. It later occurred to me that I might not really want to read it, and it sat on the shelf until late 2009. But when I decided to give it a try, I found that it held my attention throughout its 557 pages. I will not attempt a thorough review, but I would like to share some comments and a few things I learned. Since I
came to Commodore in 1987, I had always thought of the company as being
based in Commodore came close to buying Apple, but the Steves (Jobs and Wozniak) wanted more than Jack was willing to pay. The book starts out with a description of chip design and manufacture that becomes a bit tedious, but the author is a good story-teller, and his focus on the people involved keeps it interesting. Throughout the book, it becomes apparent that Commodore could have had much greater success if its management had avoided a few stupid moves. Company president Jack Tramiel was somewhat of a visionary, but his vision was very limited – it was to produce the lowest cost computer possible, and have it ready by his arbitrary deadline, even if waiting a few more months would have produced a far superior product. Meanwhile, Chairman of the Board Irving Gould refused to provide adequate financing for the company to become a long-lasting and dominant player in the computer business. They often refused to advertise adequately, although doing so could have created a huge demand for their products. On the other hand, Jack was the definition of Chutzpah. For example, He sold the first PETs by requiring advance payment with shipment guaranteed within 90 days or your money back; most buyers waited closer to 180 days, but few asked for refunds. Without this method of financing, company probably would have gone under. Technical advances by the company included primitive networking, what was in effect a digital webcam, and a working prototype touch screen in 1979. The plan was to be able to communicate audio/video via the computer. Commodore also pioneered the 80 column screen and lower case letters. One reason they could beat the competition with time and features was vertical integration – owning a chip company, so they could get the chips quickly and in necessary quantities. Apple’s claims at being first were just made up out of whole cloth. Quoting Jack’s son Leonard: “Every month they had an ad asking the question, ‘Why is Apple number one in the world of Personal Computers?’ And the answer of course was because they were number three, behind Radio Shack and Commodore. They just lied.” About Radio Shack’s TRS-80, “After a few minutes at the keyboard, many walked away dazzled by the promise of computers.” My own experience: I tried to play blackjack, but could not understand what to do, and the clerks in the store apparently knew as little as I did. This (and a price that was out of my reach) caused me to abandon my desire for a computer for a few years, until an ad for a $200 Commodore 64 caught my eye. The Commodore 64 was done fast and “good enough,” but not good. Although it was a huge success, it was the company’s last moment of true glory. It could have been a LOT better if not rushed to market and made as cheaply as possible. A new edition of the book is supposed to be coming out in 2010 with a Jack Tramiel interview (he did not comment for the first edition). The book badly needs an index, and hopefully the new edition will contain one. Even so,
this edition is worth reading for those who have an abiding interest in
Commodore, and my copy will be given as a raffle prize at the 2010
CommVEx in About the
Author: Brian Bagnall is the author of several computer books for
McGraw-Hill, Prentice-Hall The book gave me a new appreciation for my now long-gone C64 and C128 computers. --Dick Estel |
RUNning Back in Time By Recently I’ve been sorting through some old magazines that I’ve kept over the years, including a number of Commodore publications. Among these was the first issue of Run, dated January, 1984, which brings back some interesting memories. The most notable thing to me was a review of Commodore word processors. This included detailed descriptions of eleven different programs, including what the writer did and didn’t like. There’s an accompanying chart that lists features missing or present for a total of sixteen programs. A lot of us in the Fresno Commodore User Group settled on The Write Stuff as our word processor of choice, and it’s hard now to conceive that there could have been so many choices (TWS was not available at the time of this review). Another trip in the Wayback Machine involves prices, an area that offers plenty of “sticker shock” in these days of picking up a C128 for $5 or $10. In those days, before the C128 was available, Protecto Enterprizes offered the C64 for $199.50, which is only a little more than I paid for my first Commodore at Sears in 1987. This price included a coupon for “over $100 off on software.” The ad also has a “word processing system” package that includes the C64 (inexplicably described as an “84K computer,” probably a typo), a 170K Commodore 64 disk drive, a box of 10 disks, the Gemini 10X Star Micronics printer, Cardco interface, box of printer paper, 12” inch green or amber screen monitor, monitor interface cable, and Script-64 Executive Word Processor Program. The price for all this – only $995 (“list price” $1800). There was also a Farm Business System for $1095, which added specialized farm management programs for beef, pork or grain production. Articles in this premiere issue included “The Commodore Connection” (three ways to hook up your C64 to your printer), “Double Your Pleasure with Conversion Magic” (how to convert VIC20 programs to run on the C64), and “Fun with Math Facts,” (type-in programs for the VIC20 and C64). The “List
of Advertisers” filled a full page in three columns, and included such
familiar names as Abacus, Batteries Included, Parker Brothers (Q*Bert,
Frogger, Super Cobra), Parsec (apparently not the same Parsec that may
be more familiar in the later years of Commodore), and Xetec ( And in case you were a subscriber during the final days of Run, when the thickness of the magazine was about that of a floppy disk, this initial issue runs a hefty 162 pages. |
A Visit to the Roach Motel by
Lenard R. Roach (A
parody) Hail
and well met, fellow Commodore users of The
Roach Hotel sits at 6025 The
neighbors here at the Roach Hotel are friendly and always glad to hear
from you, and they let you know it.
Every time my Neon starts at As
you cruise into Coronado Hills, everybody greets you with a wave.
Yet, at some times, I wish they would use all their fingers when
they wave. However, they are
kind enough to let you know that you are number one by extending the
longest digit of the hand to you. Such
great people live here near the Hotel, and there is always a cheery
hello that comes from all of them in the form of “F—k you, cracka!” As
you enter the hotel, you enter the lounging room, complete with our
large in a wooden A
turn to the right and you have our lounging chair – one sofa, one
loveseat, and one recliner, or the
“Command Chair” as I put it. Everyone is welcome to sit and enjoy
themselves while they wait on whatever it is they are waiting on –
dinner, a snack, or an escape plan out of there.
In the command chair is where I do most of the work when it comes
to putting things onto computer as the Hotel has, not one, not two, but
THREE computers that are all tied together by a router found in one of
the rooms. About
eight steps to the west and a turn to the south you will find yourself
in the kitchen/laundry room. Here
is where the great meals consisting of Hamburger and Tuna Helpers are
concocted and set before you to enjoy or feed to the fish at your
leisure. A few steps into the kitchen and a turn to the left puts you
into the back of the Hotel where the washer and dryer are.
Sometimes we get a little absent minded at the Hotel and we
either serve your laundry and wash your food, or the other way around.
Such is the life as it is in the Hotel. From
the main entrance to the left you find the first door to the left, which
is our luxurious bathroom, decorated in a seaside setting.
Here is where our guests shower, shave and poo, whichever the
case may be. Towels are
plentiful in the towel closet at the end of the hall, but be sure to get
your towel before you get ready for your bath, or else you’re in for
an embarrassing time of it as everyone in the lounging room will be able
to see everything whole and natural, just as the good Lord made you. One
thing I must mention about the loo:
On the back of it is a beautiful sculpture of dolphins playing in
the surf that comes with built in sound.
As you rise from completing your business, the dolphins made a
playful noise of clicks and chirps while water flows from the top of the
sculpture, congratulating you on a successful trip.
Just one of the extras you will find when your visit the Roach
Hotel. As
you head down to the end of the hall you come to one of our great rooms
in the Hotel. This one is
occupied by our resident technician, mechanic, all around fixit guy, and
my son, Gabriel. He works
hard to make sure all the computers and household items, as well as
vehicles, work to top physical performance.
His bed takes up over eighty percent of his room, making closet
access and access to his desktop computer, which houses also the router
and wireless printer I must add, a little difficult but even though Gabe
is six feet six, he moves around that room like a cat. A
half step out of his room to the west and a head turn to the left you
will find where I, the great and mighty, omnipotent, stomper and poobah
of newsletter writing and editing hang my hat.
My room is larger than Gabe’s, so I get to house more stuff
like a dresser, a china cabinet (which I use for a work clothes cabinet)
a queen size bed, and my wife’s vanity table sit.
These chambers are off limits to all guests except those invited
in, and that is only for an open door visit, so don’t get any silly
ideas! Another
full step to the west and another turn of the head to the left and you
will come across the pride and joy of the Roach Hotel – the computer
room. Here is where the
great Commodore 128 sits on a large desk facing the west wall. Out of
this room comes such great writings as The Interface, Ryte Bytes, books,
plays, and other miscellaneous trinkets that happen to come in my head.
This room is open to everyone who is interested in using a
Commodore computer. So
where do guests sleep? Well,
if you’re adventurous – and I know you are – you can stretch out
in our lounging area in sleeping bags, or blankets that can be provided
by the Hotel. If you don’t
mind being used as a raceway for the cats during their midnight rampage
through the Hotel, you can get a decent night’s sleep and wake up
stiff and tired and ready for day of fun at the Hotel. What
do we do for fun here at the Roach Hotel?
If you are game, you can stroll in our somewhat well kept back
yard that views all the neighbor houses, but be careful of the recycled
Alpo piles that dot the yard. We
use these for fertilizer to make sure that the Hotel’s grass is green
and lush each spring after the winter thaw.
Out the front door, you can always play the never ending game of
“Dodge the Drunk Driver” or run with the game of “Escape the Rabid
Dog.” For those wishing to
venture off property, Kevlar, flak jackets, and M-16s will be issued
free of charge by Hotel staff. From
what I have described you can already tell it’s nothing but non-stop
fun and adventure at the Roach Hotel, so be sure to book your visit with
us soon. Our phone number
can be found on most of the bathrooms walls around some of the biggest
name truck stops of the country. We
look forward to meeting you! |
This page is sponsored by the Fresno Commodore User Group |
Articles
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Articles Page 3
Articles Page 4 Articles Page 5 Memory Lane Articles Member Biography Articles |
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Updated November 29, 2022